Sunday, November 27, 2005

Montserrat Spain y Torres Family Vineyard







Yesterday I went on a tour of Montserrat and the Torres Family Vineyard.

Montserrat is not actually "above Barcelona" as I said in my last post. It's actually northwest of Barcelona about an hour's drive or train ride inland.

The Montserrat is a centuries-old monastery which has geological, political, and religious importance to Catalonia. Apparently the site has more annual visitors than Barcelona. Geologically it is millions of years old and was surrounded by ocean; then as the waters retreated over the centuries, the interesting rock formations were made.

Besides the Catholic history and presence there, some believe that the mountain is a sort of spiritual vortex or portal, and in fact every month on the 21st a group of people ascend the mountain with expectations and hopes that the portal will open or some other apparition will happen.

In fact it was "a bright light" and the sound of "angels singing" that first brought the Catholics here in the 800's. A group of shepherd children saw the light and heard the singing and informed their parents, who also witnessed the apparition. Finally the religious leaders visited and saw and heard the same thing. The site of the original apparitions is in a cave and where the original chapel was built (photos included above).

On my long trek along the path to the original chapel, I saw a barefoot couple with their child making the hike. It was about 35 degrees Fahrenheit, and so I had to assume they were treating the path to the original site as holy ground.

I was glad to get outside the city and into a natural setting. I got a lot of great photos, a few of which I've shared with you here. The last photo is at the Torres Family winery (about an hours drive away from the monastery) of the vineyard home built in the 1800's which is a good example of the "typical" Catalonian architecture. More perhaps on the winery at another time.

Higher resolution photos are available. Just ask, and please don't use these without permission, thanks.

Tengo hambre y voy a comer.

Thursday, November 24, 2005

Happy Thanksgiving (to my U.S. readers) from Barcelona

This is a picture of the facade of my new favorite restaurant "Unicornius" where I had my "Thanksgiving" meal today. It's a vegetarian, organic restaurant near the Rambla just off Taller street. There is no smoking, a nice atmosphere, and even lovely classical and/or jazz music playing softly in the background. I eat here quite often and like it a lot. If you have just the salad bar (all you can eat) and soup with a drink it is only about 7 Euros.

Of course they don't celebrate Thanksgiving in Espana, and so I went to classes today as I will tomorrow.

I'm thankful for good health, friends, family (past and present), the freedom to choose where I live and whether I work, and for the simple things in life: food, laughter, a good movie, and sleep.

I signed up for a tour to see the Monstserrat and the wine factory this Saturday. It is an old monastery nestled high in the hills above the city which must have a spectacular view of Barcelona and the Mediterranean. I'll take pictures and try to share them with you, as well as give you interesting tidbits about the place in a few days.

From Barcelona I send you wishes for wonderful blessings, prosperity, and a bright future.

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Placa Catalunya Hoy Hace Frio





Sunday, November 20, 2005

Skinny College Kid

I went to the gym today and when I weighed myself I found that I've lost 8 lbs. since arriving in Barcelona. I now weigh 174 lbs (79 kg.) which is 8 lbs less than my 182 when I left and 14 lbs less than when I moved to West Hollywood and started with my trainer Josh.

I attribute the weight loss to a total change in lifestyle including eating habits and daily routines. When I was in the US I ate small meals every 2-4 hours and worked out regularly. In Barcelona, because of my school schedule I eat a normal breakfast (cereal with soy milk) at 8:15 a.m. then a small snack a couple hours later (an apple and a piece of bread) at noon, then at 2:30 or so I have my main meal of the day which is as much as I want to eat vegetarian in a restaurant including salad and soup. I've found when filling up at this meal, I don't really get hungry the rest of the day and so I rarely eat anything later except ocassionally I eat nuts (yeah yeah, I wish!). Plus I've only been working out about once a week, but I walk somewhere every day. The walking, eating less or no meat, and consuming less calories I'm sure have contributed to the weight loss. I've not weighed this little since college!

I think my waist size has dropped at least an inch or so. And I'm getting cruised a lot more by students, staff, men and women on the street. It's nice!

Today at the gym a very handsome, young (28 ish) guy with blonde hair helped me out at the counter when I was checking in. He translated the staff's spanish into perfect english for me (with a smile). I thanked him, and we exchanged smiles and glances throughout the rest of our workouts. If I was a brave soul I should of/would of talked to him. But..... sigh

On my way out of the gym a young woman at the counter spoke to me in American english and said "so you're from cali eh?" She was from New Jersey but was born in Spain and had returned and was now working in the gym. Although a citizen of Spain, she was raised in the US and had a resident visa there. She has been here six months and is thinking she really wants to go back to the US. She could not put into words why she wanted to return. Barcelona is wonderful she said, but the culture, and subleties here just don't work for her. She feels misunderstood, and is frustrated that she can not express herself in the local language as well as she can back home in English. Things just aren't the same here, she said.

It is difficult for Americans in Barcelona. There are the cultural differences, prejudices against Americans in general (due mostly to George Bush, and to the many Americans who travel expecting everyone else to speak English and to cater to their every demand), and the inability to communicate fully as we can in our own language. These are important considerations i need to think about while counterbalancing them against the positives: inexpensive living, good year-round weather, excellent transportation, culture, the Mediterranean, gay-friendliness, .....

I've been thinking about whether I stay beyond the end of my schooling. I've found a great web site Loquo.com which is the local Craigslist.com for Barcelona, and there are literally hundreds of postings daily for rentals. I realize now that housing will be fairly easy to obtain, and at an affordable price (from 300 euros for a room in a shared flat, to 700 - 1000 for my own flat).

Tomorrow morning I give an oral presentation of my "autobiography" in Spanish. I plan to tell the truth and tell the class (among other things) when I "came out of the closet" and announced to the world I was gay (at age 40). This should be interesting!

Hasta luego.

Thursday, November 17, 2005

Gay bar "Punto" in Barcelona

I finally made it out to a gay bar here in Barcelona. On Tuesday of this week the weather finally cleared, I'd finished my homework, had a couple glasses of wine, and decided to head out to the one bar (only bar?) I knew would be open for business before 10.00 P.M.

I hopped on the metro which is a couple short blocks from my student apartment and took the purple L2 line from Passeig de Gracia (near me) to Universitat and walked the few blocks to the bar Punto at c/Muntaner 63.

I walked in about 9 PM and was pleasantly surprised to see men scattered throughout the place. Most of the guys were in their late 20's to late 30's with a smattering of guys in their 40's. It was the guys in their 40's who all tried to make eye contact with me. I ordered a beer and had a hard time understanding how much it was (in Spanish). It turned out to only be 2.5 euros for the beer.

I sat at a small table away from the bar (and smokers) to relax and take in the scene. The boys there were relaxed and either enjoying their drink alone, or a few were with friends and enjoying each other's company. Two guys were already very drunk and could barely stand. Unfortunately, the two drunks both tried to flirt with me but I resisted eye contact. One however made his way over and sat down next to me and introduced himself. We had as much a conversation as possible considering my Spanish and he attempted to touch me wherever and whenever possible. I laughed heartily and removed his hand every time. I wanted to be nice to the first gay man I met in Barcelona, and so I was very pleasant and polite during our exchange. He suggested we go to the bar Dietrich which I've heard about and wanted to visit so I agreed and we left. When we arrived the bar was closed (it opens at 11.00 but it was still not time) and I was disappointed. Knowing I needed to get up early in the morning for class I told the guy I needed to leave and he kept insisting I stay. He wanted to make out on the sidewalk in front of Dietrich but I was not the least interested in doing so. It was quite sad actually. I got the feeling the man wanted to be seen by his "friends" making out with a handsome stranger so he could feel good and impress his friends. I did not want to play the role, and I left for home.

This Saturday night I plan to go to a gay club that is nearby. I hope this gives me a flavor of the gay scene in Barcelona. Finally. I'll let you know how it goes. Manana, more classes. Until next time.

That's how things look tonight from Barcelona.

Monday, November 14, 2005

Learning a new language is FUCKING HARD!

Holy Cow I'm learning a lot of shit. They really pour it on in this language school.

I'm beginning my fourth week and we've learned the present, past and future tenses, and a lot of shit I should have learned in school about English but didn't and so I couldn't even repeat it here for you. In high school I did TERRIBLE in Spanish and here I am again learning it. I am doing much better this time around (understanding more) but I am still in the bottom quartile (in my opinion) of my class. It's just so fucking hard for me to get. It takes a long time to grasp.

For example we've learned how to speak the different forms of verbs such as the verb "to have."

In English you say:

I have: (Spanish: tengo)
I am having: (teniendo)
I had: (he tenido)
I'm going to have: (soy a tener)
I will have: yo tendre
I would have: yo tendria

How nuts is that?!

They keep pouring on new words every day and I have difficulty keeping up with the new vocabulary more than I do learning the new concepts. I can conjugate a verb just great, but recalling the verbs (and nouns, adjectives, prepositions, and ....) themselves is a challenge for me.

But "un poco un poco" - little by little I learn more Spanish.

It's been raining every day in Barcelona over the past week or so. Thunderstorms and periodic heavy rain. There's usually a break in the afternoon to go for a walk to have lunch or whatever.

With my health improved I'm beginning to think beyond the day. Will I stay past January and explore Europe before returning to the States? Or will I go "home" (although I'm technically homeless) as planned on my scheduled flight. I'm finding there are many possibilities for renting an affordable flat in or outside the city that would provide me a base from which I can explore the city and surrounding areas and the rest of Europe. It makes sense to do this while I'm already here even though I would technically be "illegal." I've not visited Sitges yet, but that seems like a good place to think about as it is a gay resort town, in a natural setting (the beach), has a gay nightlife, etc.

Adios for now, back to my studies.

Saturday, November 12, 2005

The Preacher Who Violated

Saw the face of a man in the paper
the kind of face you wish you could forget
he was a preacher -- one who spoke with confidence

i was a kid who wanted to be the teachers pet
never forgot the preacher and what he did to me
never would deal with it but secrets just don't keep

never forgot the preacher who violated me
how can there be any good come from me?
he was a moral man who loved his wife and kids
he preached himself an example in all he said and did

i was old enough to know i had desire
i was young enough to believe an easy liar
never forgot the preacher and what he did to me
never would deal with it but secrets just don't keep
never forgot the preacher who violated me
how can there be any good come from me?

oh the feelings, will they ever go?
oh the memories will they ever show...
the pain i have had
the strength i now have
wholly and fully feeling
wholly and fully seeing
am i fully free?

"caught and hemmed in" is what the paper said
off to jail he now preaches from his cell
i forgive him what happened long ago

but forgiveness is not a word but a life that I chose

never forgot the preacher and what he did to me
never would deal with it but secrets just don't keep
never forgot the preacher who violated me,
won't forget, won't regret what he did to me

won't forget what he did to me.

Jallen Rix
album: The Sacred and the Queer
"What the Preacher Did to Me"

Gay American in Barcelona

Being an internationally aware citizen of the world, I realize how stupid it is to say I'm "American." "American" could mean I'm from north, central, or south america, right? Most people from the U.S. never think of this. But I digress already.

If you're a reader of my old webiste "I'm Gay, So What?" you know that I came out of the closet very late (at age 40) and my first real "long-term" relationship with a guy was with Ricardo who I met while on vacation in Puerta Vallarta, Mexico. Ricardo now lives with his new boyfriend in Amsterdam. Ricardo and I stay in touch via email and he is on my list of recipients who get updates of my adventures abroad. Ricardo refered me to a good friend of his who happens to live in Barcelona and is gay. He hoped we would get together and that his friend would introduce me to the gay life and culture here. I thought that was very thoughtful of him....

Being quite shy, I nervously called this friend of Ricardo's and got voice mail. I left a nervous message inviting the man to return my call or email me and I expressed hope we could get together and I would like to treat him to dinner to celebrate his recent birthday.

I called him last Tuesday and I've not heard from him. If I was more agressive I would of/should of, called him again. In fact I spoke with Ricardo this week and he suggested I do just that.

But I've not called him back. I suppose I will, but I just don't feel like stalking some guy I don't even know.

I really do need to give Gay Barcelona a try. I understand it is fabulous, and that the Spanish culture is such that age is not an issue like is in the States. In the U.S. I feel quite OLD. But supposedly here in Spain my age is irrelevant. I like the concept but I'll believe it when I experience it.

As an older gay man, I'm still pretty fortunate. While I am 49, I still have a good physique (32" waist, 6'1", 179 lbs., lean and muscled, a mostly-full head of hair still mostly dark brown (some grey starting to show)). So when I mention I am "retired" to people in school for example, I get strange looks and comments like I am way too young to be retired. Which I appreciate of course.

Okay, so it is 8 p.m. in Barcelona. I'm considering going out for the first time to brave the gay bars here. This means I will need to take a nap and then proceed to the bars after midnight if I want to find more than one or two people in the bars. Most of the activity takes place between 2 a.m. and 5 a.m. Will I make it? We'll see.

That's how things look tonight from Barcelona, Spain.

Friday, November 11, 2005

Hola PeopleSoft

Hola to my regular reader from PeopleSoft. Just a quick note to let you know I worked at PS for three years as a project manager. Maybe you already knew that. Anyway, hello and I hope you enjoy my adventures. Drop me a note if you want: thatgaybloggerguy@hotmail.com

Sarah's Voice

spend all your time waiting
for that second chance
for a break that would make it okay
there's always some reason
to feel not good enough
and it’s hard at the end of the day

i need some distraction
or a beautiful release
memories seep from my veins
they may be empty
or they're weightless and maybe
i'll find some peace tonight

in the arms of the angel
far away from here
from this dark cold hotel room
and the endless looks that you feel

you are pulled from the wreckage
of your silent revelry
you’re in the arms of the angel
may you find some comfort here

so tired of the straight life
and everywhere you turn
there's vultures and thieves at your back
the storm keeps on twistin'
keep on buildin' the lies
that you make up for all that you lack
it don't make no difference
escaping one last time
it's easier that you believe
in this sweet madness
oh this glorious sadness
that brings me to my knees

in the arms of the angel
far away from here
from this dark cold hotel room
and the endless looks that you feel

you are pulled from the wreckage
of your silent revelry
you're in the arms of the angel
may you find some comfort here

you're in the arms of the angel
may you find some comfort here

Angel
Sarah McLachlan
Surfacing

and that's what I hear today from Barcelona

until next time

Thursday, November 10, 2005

Gay Classical Music

Before I left the States for Espana, I bought an Ipod and recorded most of my hundreds of CD's so I would not have to bring them here with me. Right now, while watching the stock market (it's 7:30 pm here in BCN but 10:30 in LA) I'm listening to the "gay classics" from gay composers Copland, Dawn, Chopin, Tchaikovsky, Bernstein, Barber, Finale-Saint-Saens, Schubert, Britten. Yes my friends, they were all gay.

Hasta luego.

Wednesday, November 09, 2005

El principe azul - The perfect person

The teacher asked me (in spanish) does the perfect person exist? I said no way.

She proceeded to go around the room asking what the physical and personality characteristics were of the perfect person for each student. The idea was we would respond in Spanish with the description of the perfect person.

The two young male estudiantes were uncomfortable with the question and dodged the answer.

The teacher and Carlotta were egging me on to describe the "perfect woman" that I wanted. Finally the teacher asked for "famous people" who embodied the perfect person. She looked right at me and insisted I answer. I said Brad Pitt. I flushed a little and did not dare look around the room. Carlotta did not look at me and the teacher just looked right at me and smiled without flinching.

Later Carlotta looked at me and laughed again. I think she thinks I was playing with the class when I said Brad Pitt.

Oh Jesus! I guess I may as well just say it in class that "Soy gay" Si, "Soy estadounidense, vivo en Los Angeles, soy jubilado." I'm American, I live in L.A. and I'm retired. I just need to add the part that says "I'm gay."

Tuesday, November 08, 2005

Temple de Sagrada Familia

What a difference a few days make! I'm finally feeling completely recovered and now I am alive again. I see with my eyes and experience with my senses the sights, sounds and sensations of Barcelona. I'm laughing with my fellow students, enjoying the learning experience, noticing more the amazing architecture and sites Barcelona has, and I get out more to see all this amazing city has to offer. I'm feeling many different emotions and sensations as I allow myself the freedom to be.

I've found a routine that works:


  • 7:30 a.m. Get up and get ready for the day. Have breakfast.
  • 9:00 - 1:00 Classes.
  • 1:30 Lunch. A big and healthy one. Makes due for the rest of the day. This is a big change for me. In the U.S. I would eat about every 3 hours or 4 times a day. This is supposedly healthy for you, but here in Barcelona, it works for me to have one big meal and then I'm done for the day! I may get hungry later and if so I eat some fruit or nuts.
  • 2:00 - 6:00 Check email, check my investments, go to the gym (2-3x a week), visit the city or go on a tour, do homework.
  • 6:00 - 10:00 p.m. Monitor the business news and the U.S. stock market. I plan to start doing more visiting and social activities during this time.

Today in class our teacher handed out photos of exotic and weird people and we were supposed to take on the persona of the person in the photo and with our backs to our partner we talked in Spanish describing ourselves to the other person. It was to simulate Internet "chat." For example, I would say in Spanish I am tall, have brown hair, etc. based on the photo we were given. My photo was of a transvestite in a leather outfit. The girl next to me saw my picture and thought it was soooo funny she started to laugh and could not stop. She was laughing so hard she could not control herself! It was so absolutely hilarious. The girl's name is Carlotta and she is Italian. I have not come out to anyone in my class, but have no problem doing so if the question ever comes up. I don't know what Carlotta was thinking was so funny, but it was infectious and fun.

My "partner" was Carl from Sweden. He is so typically Swedish: blonde hair, blue eyes and very handsome. He works at the Swedish embassy in Barcelona. He is 28. We had fun today.

Okay, so what about Sagrada Familia? The school sponsored a tour of the symbol of Barcelona today and I decided to go. We met at the temple/church and were guided by Raul who was so very handsome I had a hard time concentrating on what he said. He was so thoroughly knowledgable of the Sagrada Familia, and it was interesting to hear his explanations both in Spanish and English. His English was good. And his eyes green. His teeth ever so white. His hair black. His beard about 3 days growth. When he looked at me I thought I would fall right into his soul. I tried my best not to stare. He may have been in his late 20's or up to his late 30's but it was hard to tell. He had a smattering of grey hair throughout his head but it must have been premature. Interestingly, I found that I actually understood a lot of what he was saying in Spanish! To me, this is amazing in and of itself.

Where the fuck are the pictures you are saying. I promise I will eventually post pictures. I have purposefully not been carrying my camera around because I did not want to look like the other American tourists who carry their cameras around.

Here's a quick synopsis of what I remember about the Sagrada Familia:

  • The temple construction began in 1882 and one year later Antoni Gaudi was appointed the project director. He personally worked on the project over 40 years.
  • Gaudi only saw the first of three fascades before he died of an accident. He was run over by a cable car. His plans for the project continue today.
  • It could take 35 to 150 years to finish the project, depending on who you ask.
  • Two of the three fascades have been built and the third is under construction. Each of the three fascades has (or will have) four towers, each representing the 12 apostles.
  • When the project is finished there will be two more towers taller than all the rest in the center of the structure. Those will be of Mary and Jesus. Jesus of course will be the highest tower about twice the height of the apostle's towers.
  • The oldest fascade faces East where the sun rises and shines on it. This fascade represents life and is dedicated to the birth of Jesus, and to Mary and Joseph.
  • All of the construction is based on Gaudi's appreciation and knowledge of nature which he learned and observed while growing up. The colors (all natural, no paint or colors), the structure (the columns branch out like trees at the tops), the staircases (they spiral like a sea shell), and more, are all representations of nature. On the East fascade there are depictions of the birth of Jesus, the killing of all babies under a certain age by the Romans, Joseph and his carpentership, Mary, and more.
  • The West fascade, where the Sun (or Son?) sets (or "dies") is where the last days of Jesus are portrayed. For example, the Last Supper, the Crucifiction, Betrayal, and Ascension are all portrayed here. The columns that support this fascade look like tree trunks and at the same time look like bones, symbolizing death.
  • A nearby street called Calle de Antoni Gaudi is the only street in Barcelona that runs North/South. Gaudi believed that energy runs from North to South and so this street runs right into the only "opening" (I don't know quite what that is) in the church, which is to allow the energy to enter it.
  • Gaudi was buried in the underground premises below the only functioning chapel in the "under construction" facility. I tried to go see his tomb, but it was closed.

That's what I recall from the tour. I can not attest to the accuracy of it all, so don't sue me if it's incorrect.

We climbed the stairs of the East fascade and it was quite an ascension. From the many portals along the way we could see the entire skyline of the city. At one point I asked Raul what was the tall structure in the distance (the thing that looks like a penis the size of the Empire State Building). His reply was that some people think it is a tribute to the male anatomy, but he let us know it was the building of the water company that supplies water to the city. I forget who the architect was, but I loved his answer, as he looked at me with his white teeth and green eyes.

Saturday, November 05, 2005

Priorities

I found that my schedule of six hours a day of classes from 9.00 a.m. to 3 p.m. daily was too much (demasiado). The first four hours are instruction, and the last two are conversation with a native speaking teacher. I decided I needed the afternoon to eat, study, and check my email and investments on the computer. And so I did that this week and it made a world of difference. Now I have a routine of going to a great health food restaurant nearby where you get all you can eat of both a salad (serve yourself with every great thing under the sun), and hot foods (I usually get the stewed lentil soup). Along with that you get all the deserts, coffee, etc. you want, but I usually only partake in the salad and soup, which is plenty. All this for 7.80 Euros. I make this my main meal of the day and find I don't need anything else but a small snack the rest of the day. Very healthy and economical. After lunch I head back to my room to do homework, review my notes from class for the day, and check my email. The U.S. stock markets open 3.30 my time and I monitor that for the rest of the day, or I might head out and explore the city.

I had a bit of a relapse on the chest infection and went back on the antibiotics. It may be the cigarette smoke that is everywhere in Barcelona that is conspiring against my getting completely well. But today I feel well.

Last weekend I walked to the Bari Gotic and checked out the old architecture and the narrow pedestrian streets, and the Cathedral. As I walked the narrow streets I imagined what it must have been like before the automobile and saw horse-driven carriages passing casually through the narrow brick/cobblestone streets as pedestrians with big hats courteously scampered out of the way. I saw people laughing and saying hello to each other. Then a whiff of someone's cigarette smoke brought me back to reality. But the charm of the streets is still very much evident and alive. I can see why this part of the city is many people's (gente) favorite.

I visited the cathedral during the afternoon hours which apparently is the "not" free time. During these hours they charge visitors to help collect funds to restore the old place. I decided it was worth the 4 or so Euros to go in when it was convenient and probably less crowded. And it was worth it. It was like many old European cathedrals I've seen, but this one had an inside, open-air, courtyard with a garden and geese. Inside one of the small courtyard ancillary chapels I heard some beautiful music which at first I thought was being piped in through a sound system, but it turned out to be a very talented musician playing his guitar outside the church walls on one of the narrow streets surrounding the cathedral. Later, after leaving the cathedral I saw him and paused to listen for a while and then dropped a Euro in his guitar case before moving on. But before I left the cathedral I took the elevator to the top of the cathedral where they have outdoor pedestrian observation decks (much like at the Cathedral of Notre Dame in Paris). Although the views were not as spectacular as Paris, it did give me an interesting perspective of Barcelona, and I could see the Mediterranean.

I worked out at a local gym this past week. This is the first time I've exercised since leaving the U.S. While working out I saw a whole lot of very hot looking guys! I also saw a row of about 10 televisions each with a different station that you can tune into through various radio frequencies. Which station do you think caught my eye? Not the soap opera where two lovers, nude, were making love (although I did pause there a minute or so), but rather the giraffes that were obviously being intimate with each other. Not sexually, but gently nudging and showing affection for each other. It was then and there that I remembered how much I loved nature and animals as a child. I decided that my next Barcelona destination would be the zoo.

Today I went to the Barcelona zoo. I walked from my room in the school on Gran Via to Via Laietana and down through the Bari Gotic, worked my way to the Mercat del Santa Caterina which was filled with people. I bought an apple from one of the hundreds of vendors and proceeded away from the crowds on towards the zoo. Without a map and just following my instincts, I ended up passing by the Picasso Museum and made a mental note of where it was. I proceeded in the direction I knew the zoo was and passed by an interesting structure that turned out to be an ancient site called Born. Inside this giant structure they have preserved the ancient ruins of the city as it was over 400 year ago. The information there said this was the only place in all of Europe that had such a site preserved for posterity. They are planning to renovate the site and make it a museum that shows what the old homes, streets and markets looked like in "ancient" times. I proceeded only a few blocks and saw the entrace to the park and the zoo. A frantic American passed by asking anyone who would listen "Excuse me! Do you know where the Picasso Museum is?! It closes in five minutes and I have to get there!" Seeing that I was the only person in ear shot who could help him, I pointed him in the right direction.

The zoo was pretty cool. I was the only person there who was alone, and without a coat or sweater. Everyone else had a jacket, a sweater, a spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend, and (most with) a baby with a stroller. It was not exactly cold, but it would have been a good idea for me to have something besides a t-shirt. But it was o.k. I enjoyed seeing the animals, and seeing the Spanish translation for them all. I had a bocadillo atun (tuna sandwich) and a vino tinto (red wine) near the end of my visit in the zoo and made my way out of the zoo and through the City Park (Parc de la Ciutadella) which is beautiful and magnificent in its own right. I made my way down the long stretch of walkway through the park towards what looked reminiscent of the Arc de Triomf in Paris, and sure enough it was the "Arc del Triomf" in Barcelona! I instinctively made my way on foot to my own neighborhood and arrived just as my local grocery store was opening and bought myself a bottle of local vino and returned to my room at the school.

OK, so priority number 1 is: I need more time for myself, and so I've cancelled my conversation classes in the afternoon. Priority number two is a bit more complicated.

I'm gay, and so I thought I needed to find the "gay area" and gay bars to try and mix with the local gays and meet other gay people. I've tried twice now to wander through what is supposedly the "gay" area and I've not found much of anything. It's probably because I go too early (i.e., before 1 a.m.) and frankly, I don't really want to meet someone in a smoke filled bar! I am much too old for this and I decided that I can use my time and energy in other ways.

So I learned of an English speaking "club" that meets in Barcelona for social and cultural activities where Spanish and English speaking people get together to meet. On Tuesday nights they have conferences where a speaker presents different topics. For instance the next few Tuesdays are: "Domestic Violence," "global warming," and "the trend of more and more people living alone." I've decided to attend these sessions. They should be interesting and maybe I will meet some nice people.

Wednesday, November 02, 2005

A peek inside my soul

Hola from Barcelona. This is a copy of an email I just sent to the wonderful woman who is taking care of my cat while I'm away. I replied to her very witty and open/honest email she sent to me.

Dear ----:

You crack me up! I'm absolutely certain you would be the life of any party! Any party would not be one without you present.

Isn't it a shame there are so many prejudices in the world? I never thought about what you might be going through as a widow. It's so silly! As an "older" gay man, I have my own issues. The gay culture is very much into youth (as is much of our society) and being 49 and single it is hard for me "catch" the boys like I used to. I don't have the wit and charm that you do; I used to rely on my good looks alone, but that won't work anymore! So I need to come up with some more tricks.

Part of why I came to Barcelona was to begin the journey to "find" myself. I don't know what I'll find but so far I'm beginning to think I am not necessarily a city boy. I love nature, animals, the stars, spiritual things. Crowds, noise, smoke, pollution, cement, traffic, don't fall into those categories very well. So would I be more content living in a forest or on a river or someplace like that? I don't know! Damn, I guess I'll have to try all kinds of places before I know where I want to settle. Or maybe I will never settle down, and remain a gypsie of the world.

As for finding Cafe Americaine, no I've not found it yet. Will I? I don't know. I always seem to find it when I'm in the "no smoking" California bars, but here? One step inside a bar and my sinuses are blocked and I can't breathe! Help!?

I'm glad you are taking care of Mr. Kitty. He is a wonderful person, and I'm glad you can keep each other company.

Take care,